disclaimer: I will not be held accountable for the following post as there has been way too little sleep and much too much caffeine during the past 24 hours.
I can't do it. My dog. I can't kill him. He is in pain, unable to move. Clearly he is dying and I can't bring myself to end his life. Of all times for me to have a moral dilemma, I choose now. Geezus.
As I type the screen blurs from tears I can't allow to fall. What if I don't stop crying? I don't have the freaking time to linger in states of heightened emotion, especially sorrow; therefore, I'm not even going to start to cry. No way. Argh, but I can't help it.
Why won't he just go? I've been telling him what a great dog he's been, that he's protected us well and that it's alright for him to go. He just looks at me with sad eyes that ask, 'Now?' My gosh! I can't take this ache in my chest. My throat is closing.
I just wish he'd die, that he'd fall asleep and dream his last dream. Another day of this and I'm going to lose it. If he's not dead by morning, I'll have to have the vet come over. There's no other choice.
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