There are lots of people who believe that an eating disorder is an eating disorder is an eating disorder; that we're all in the same boat somehow. Therefore, Fat Fannie and Emaciated Emily should have some things in common. After all, it's about food. Right? Wrong.
Now, I've never played on team fat. I don't know what it would be like to be fat; horrid, I assume. What I have experience with is anorexia and bulimia. Even they are drastically different. At least they have been for me.
My perception of a fat person's psyche may be odd. They seem to be so disorganized in their heads, wishy washy. Like their fat, their thoughts spill out upon one another. They don't seem to ever really get anywhere; but when they do, there is an abundance of everything. They bedazzle their very lives with cheap sparkles.
Bulimics are the ragers, the party goers. Reckless and ready for anything that comes their way. Consequences aren't even an afterthought. Before the reality of a consequence sets in, bulimics are already distracted by the next thing. They are running from the moment, running from their thoughts. However, bulimics lives are rich with experience.
Anorexics. I don't know how clearly I see anorexics. Anorexics exist in a state of anticipation. They may be graceful, contained, controlled. Anorexics exude superiority, but their fragility whispers an undertone of fear. Anorexics line up the chaos of life as neatly as they can.
To say that people with eating disorders have some commonality within their disorders is kind of pointless. It's like saying all humans have similar emotions. What's the point of saying something so banal? One thing is certain: A fat day for a fat girl is not the same as a fat day for bulimics and anorexics. There is no way that feeling can be the same. Fat people ARE fat. The rest of us are just crazy. (I mean that in a loving way, guys.)
Amazing insight...so accurate and well said.
ReplyDelete[...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Ana Greyheart, gweni. gweni said: latest (short) blog post: all EDs created equal http://is.gd/bZ9rX [...]
ReplyDeleteYea, so all ed's come from different places, yea they arn't all exactly the same,
ReplyDeletebut they all share the self loathing for themselves which they need to get over.
For a fat girl, EVERYDAY is a fat day..
It is just the same, that feeling of worthlessness, failure, disgust...
i don't know why but this post has kinda hit me hard..
Makes me feel like my successes are just "cheap sparkles"
Even though it is SO HARD to recover from this ED which you seem to think isn't as "important" or "aloft" as the other more commonly talked about problems..
As if us fat girls don't have it hard enough, at least skinny girls are accepted by society, people make clothes, and FASHION for skinny girls. Us fatties however don't have any choice.
I just think that although this entry is interesting in terms of describing the differences (i agree with disorganised/ partiers/ ocd.) and i think you should be honest, but you shouldn't disregard the problems your not familiar with, as if we arn't important and we don't have problems as big as yours.
Sorry if i took this more personally than you meant it to be, i'm just having a "fat day" but i suppose you wouldn't understand...
Tink
hey Tink,
ReplyDeleteI wonder if maybe you were projecting or reading into the post, because I read your response and I'm not sure where you got the idea that one ED is more important or better than another.
The point of this post is to highlight the obvious; that of course there is a commonality between all eating disorders, but that one can not address and cope with them in the same way. The differences in personalities, in the way the ED is acted out, merits division among the disorders; therefore, coping skills have to be tweaked to suit each of the EDs. Behavior modification therapies that use a one size fits all approach to EDs are doomed to fail us.
I feel sorry that you took this so hard. It certainly wasn't intended to hurt your (or anyone's) feelings.
xo
gweni
Ok I understand what you are saying, and i think the reason i read so much into it, is because I am the "fat person" in all its disorganized cheap sparkled glory...
ReplyDeleteAnd i hate it....
Plus it was 2am, and i had just eaten a meal and felt gross...
All these factors probably influenced my response.
Sorry
Tink x
@Tink
ReplyDeleteApology accepted, not necessary, but accepted. I want to know what you think. I want your honest opinions. Please don't ever worry about offending me or anything like that.
I love debate more than so many other things in life.
And the bedazzled thing isn't an insult! Two of my besties are big gals. They love shiny, sparkly things and trinkets, little reminders of fanciful fantasies. I love them both with all my heart and wish I were 1/10th as girlie as they are. :)
xo
gweni