Image by doug88888 via FlickrI finally stopped pissing out my ass. Thanks to some bit of common sense smacking me upside the head, I put the stupid laxatives away. I have no clue how many years those had been in my cupboard. Now I'm trying to get fluids in, but I'm miserable.
I hate my life. I want to vanish. I find myself thinking about just what would happen to my children if I jumped ship. There is a big possibility that they'd be better off without me. My influence at this point can't be good. I just want to be nutz and alone. I'd be content with a Layne Staley-esque death. Just forget I'm here, let me wither and check out my house when it starts to smell like rotting flesh.
Is that so much to ask? For anyone who wonders about suicide, I suggest watching a film called, The Bridge. It'll put suicide into perspective for you. People shouldn't be forced to stay alive just because you want them to. We should have a choice, alternatives. For some people, life is that painful and agonizing.
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